pouët.net

still waiting for the funny one, psonice :)

Reed: if you didn't find that funny, you haven't been drinking enough beer.

Btw, did you hear frank bruno was caught with his penis in a packet of ritz biscuits in the mental hospital? He admitted afterwards he was fucking crackers :)

..or cracking the f#ckers =)

A son is arguing with his father:
- Your father is gay! - boy said.
- No! Your father is gay!

joke acknowledged.

Ha Ha Ha.
?
But honestly, nice jokes.

This is reported by a graduate of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, citing one of Dr. Schlambaugh's final test questions for his final exam of 1997. Dr. Schlambaugh is known for asking questions like this one on his final exam: "Why do airplanes fly?" In May 1997, the Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II final exam question was: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof."

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Laws or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell it does not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Some of the religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.

With the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of the change in the volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order
for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.

So:
A1) If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and the pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.

Or:
A2) If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Theresa Banyan during freshman year, that "it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have NOT succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then A2 cannot be
true....Thus hell is exothermic.

The student, Tim Graham, got the only A.

well done, sim. the first post in this thread that actually made me laugh :)

..but what if a soul and an antisoul gets created near the edge of the hell and other one of them gets sucked in instead of them destroying each other? hmmh?

What does a programmer with a sixth sense says?

I see people..

Something irrelevant but funny to me:
Yesterday, my friend Jon who knows the demoscene and had gone to Euskal parties, tried to introduce me to the most preety Erasmus girl as a computer programmer and it was really funny for me! (dialog follows)

Jon: Hallo, this is Michael from Greece, a very good programmer!
Me: No, you shouldn't tell that to her, that's a big mistake!!!
Jon: But why? You are just very good? :)
Me: She doesn't need to know!
Jon: But why? ;)
Me: You might scare her away from me :/
Her: (laughs)
Me: Afteralls it's uninteresting for her..
Jon: But why? She programms too! Tell me Marina, you are in electronics, you have program courses there, don't you?
Her: Yes, we have. I know ein bischen programming! ;)

Me: Uhm,.. ok then. What are you programming in?
Her:..
Me: I mean which language do you know? Fortran, C, Pascal?
Her: Yes, we had Fortran, I know that.
Me: Ok, how about assembly?! (laughs)
Her: Oh zeah, assemblar, we made assemblar too. Es ist egal fur mich :]
Me: I hate C and C++
Her: Yes, me too. Basic is sehr cool though :)
Me: You know, C is like a black box, like... how to say, a set of abstractions, like a fake but,.. do you understand???...... (She changes her view and talks to the guy next to her :P)

After that, I remembered the first picture at http://www.pouet.net/topic.php?which=734 and tried to describe it to my friend =)

The other funny thing is what happend after I spreaded the URL with the Erasmus strabaparty photos.
http://optimus.demoscene.gr/O-Phase2003

I was just so crazy and whatever, that I wrote also about demoscene and silly stupid comments in it, inside or outside jokes that have nothing to do with Erasmus people who don't know me. It was just a free, let it flow, expression :)

For example, it's crazy that in one comment in a photo, I give a link to Candytron, which is totally irrelevant :)

Or that at the first page, I write irrelevant things about myself and advertise the demoscene :)
Yesterday at the party, three people asked me: "Could you explain what the demoscene is? It seems interesting to me!" Lol! :)
One was so drunken, that I couldn't figure out, what he wanted to tell me. He said "Before, I didn't knew the demoscene, but when I went to your site I learned. Now I know what the demoscene is!". I tried to ask him if he downloaded and watched any demo and where did he read and learned about the demoscene? (In pouet FAQ perhaps?) but it was impossible :)

The funniest, do you see the photo and the comments in the very 1st photo at the 3rd page? That lady found me at the party and asked me: "Excuse me! I have seen your website with the photos, but what do you mean by saying RGB?" LOL =)

No, there is no questions asking what the demoscene is, in the Pouet FAQ. I never got to read the Pouet FAQ before :)

Optimus: were you introduced to this woman on an internet chatroom, or do really add 'colon close bracket' at the end of sentences? ;)

Heh, no! In real life of course. And that's why it was funny to me :)

LOL

jesus christ, speaking about necromancing threads!

i started laughing by just looking at the post dates :D

At a local college, there was a dance. A guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug".
She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."
A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss".
She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."
Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich".
She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it."

I am wondering though.. it's been 3 years... did optimus get laid in that time?

Q: how many sceners do you need to screw in a lightbulb?
A: at least two, but the have to be REALLY small.

(for non-native-speakers: check the different meanings of "screw")

lol

A grasshopper hops into a bar.
The bartender says to the grasshopper, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!"
The grasshopper says, "Really? You have a drink named 'Bob?'"

A horse walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Ha Ha Ha