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most silly email of the week:

category: general [glöplog]
my absolute favourite (i received this actually):

Quote:

Hey, how's it going? =

Better than all other Spam filt= ers -

Only Delivers The Email You Want!

This is the ultimate solution that is guaranteed to stop all spam
without=20 losing any of your important email! This system protects you 100%.=20

We didn't believe it either until we actually tried it. So you be the = judge=20 and see for yourself.

You owe it to yourself to try this program, and forward thi= s email=20 to all of your friends
who hate Spam or as many people as possible.

Get rid of unwanted emails now.

If you want to stop = receiving this

P.revia Marketing, Inc.
14781 Memorial Dr. / Suite 966
Houston, TX 77079

Conforms to legal requirements of 2003 US Can-Spam A= ct.
added on the 2004-12-06 19:32:02 by blala blala
actually i wonder how do i get rid of spam in my rl mailbox. because carrying shitload of paper from mailbox to trash can aint that pleasure ( even compared to pressing 'delete' button ) :/
added on the 2004-12-06 20:12:07 by apricot apricot
[quote]actually i wonder how do i get rid of spam in my rl mailbox. because carrying shitload of paper from mailbox to trash can aint that pleasure ( even compared to pressing 'delete' button ) :/[quote]

Stop looking at porn, for starters.
added on the 2004-12-06 20:14:26 by NoahR NoahR
I have received quite some funny emails in greek language, from kids asking me how to become "hackers". None of these however, beats that 54kb email explaining about my capricorn self ;P
added on the 2004-12-07 09:56:51 by Optimus Optimus
Quote:
Stop looking at porn, for starters.

now that's just stupid.
added on the 2004-12-07 16:21:08 by skrebbel skrebbel
Hmmm.... lurking around... Below is the funniest mail I ever got. To this date noone has confessed that they sent this, so who knows, maybe this guy was for real.

Quote:

Date: Tue, 19 Nov 96 23:07:00 PST
From: XXXX XX XX <someone@some.server.at.some.country>
To: 'MRI' <mri@penti.sit.fi>
Subject: fellow coder

You've probably never heard of me but you will. I'm a fan of the demo
scene. I love bringing my friends over to my place to watch PC demos (Hmm
what kind of friends are they I wonder; do they like me or are they just
coming over for the demos). To prepare them for the brilliance of the demos
I usually run my own personal programs beforehand; we have a good laugh, the
bastards.
I've run Quake on my computer. It has a facility to display the update
rate. I wrote a test program to fill the screen with a single color using
address A000:0000 after calculating the value of the color by adding 1 to a
variable, the entire thing is integers by the way. Quake running at the same
resolution 320x200 full screen with full perspective correction active can
sometimes run much faster than my test. People just don't appreciate the
intelligence of ID's coders; I mean, to be able to cram the entire Quake
code into less than about three lines must not be easy.
Allright, I want some answers. What is the cheat code for the compiler
or the computer to switch it to full speed mode? I'm contacting several
other demo groups including Future Crew, first groups to give me the answer
will get credits in my demo. Feel free to include hardware code information
for Hi-Res Hi-Color VGA or Sound Blaster 16 etc. I don't want any
mathematics just hardware specific information; I made my own graphics and
sound programs . When you send the info you can include how you want your
credits to appear (or even if you don't want them to appear, although after
you see my demo I can guarantee you will want your names on it) My graphic
and sound engine has been in development for over three years. I can give
you a preview now if you like to prove my worthiness, but I'd recommend you
wait till after I've implemented your trick unless you are faint-hearted.
I know about approximations such as sine wave sampling and pixel
stretching etc. my code is very efficient, my mathematical algorithms are
not from books so therefore my programs are very high quality, yes I even
know about this too. Second Reality's speed was almost better rated in
seconds per frame rather than frames per second before I got the patch. I
think my programs are affected by something similar, I want to know about
it.

I believe I've created a radically different realtime 3D engine to
anything before; It doesn't even use 3d-to-2d projection and it's more
realistic. It can do everything that I've seen in the latest demos
(including bump-mapping as you call it where you use a texture map to hold
offset for the normal vector I think?) and more. Its more synergistic
meaning that not only is it more realistic but I believe it's also easier to
program than the current widespread form of 3d. As for the speed; I'm not so
sure but once you help me fix the speed inhibitor problem then we'll be able
to asses its validity properly.
I've also developed a new sound program. It has many features: echo,
reverb, filtering. The filtering can be used for noise reduction and
unlimited bass enhancement. In short, I designed it for making professional
sound and music. If someone gives me information for MOD file format I can
probably enhance current music files through my program and the result could
be sold commercially in music stores. It's a shame that I've heard lots of
brilliant pc music wasted (running through programs which only alter the
amplitude and frequency of samples and add them together, I think) which I'd
like to share with the rest of the populace and could probably become great
hits of all time and earn the musician lots of money. My program has much
more features: you can play samples or build sounds using algorithmic
waveforms such as sine, parabola, triangle, square , saw-pulse with variable
peak, and square-pulse with variable activity period and more. It can do
linear-interpolation and go even further to curved-interpolation without
using b-splines or bezier curves (at least I don't think so; I don't really
know what they are). You can even plot your own samples manually with
uniform or non-uniform x spacing. I'm gonna need hardware coding information
for soundcards though. I've never actually heard any of my work. I only know
some of my algorithms work because it turns out you can use them for graphic
applications; I used the envelope-generator in my graphic program and I also
used the filtering algorithm for the camera tracking artificial
intelligence, curved interpolation and/or filtering could be used to produce
the smoothest possible animations etc.
I'll be uploading my programs in a couple of days and tell you where to
get them, but if you send me hardware specific info then I can make them run
properly. Don't ask me to give you or let you see any of my source code
unless it's hardware specific and not mathematical; I'm fed-up of people
asking me. What you will get though is free games that I make if you like,
as well as your name in the credits. I advise you to not send me
mathematical algorithms because I intend to freely distribute any info you
give me. It will also save me time not having to search through the info
looking for hardware coding since I know how to do every mathematical
programming trick there is so far, I believe. If you don't believe me then
test me; watch my demo so far.

added on the 2004-12-07 22:20:37 by mri mri
Somehow that sounds like Optimus's rantings a while back when he was eager to know everything about PC video hardware :)
added on the 2004-12-07 22:23:29 by Preacher Preacher
"...People just don't appreciate the
intelligence of ID's coders; I mean, to be able to cram the entire Quake
code into less than about three lines must not be easy..."


wow, i'm absolutely speechless...
:)))
added on the 2004-12-07 22:33:55 by blala blala
Wow! mri this is an absolute gem you've got here. No wonder why you kep for about 8 years now :)
I thought to Optimus too.
added on the 2004-12-07 23:02:41 by p01 p01
At least people still had to write long personal emails back then. No stupid web forums or instant messenger gibberish.
added on the 2004-12-07 23:08:16 by Stelthzje Stelthzje
btw: That mails sounds like many discussions found on the usenet a few years ago. (fuck science and theory, I can hack it better!)
added on the 2004-12-07 23:09:46 by Stelthzje Stelthzje
What is the cheat code for the compiler
or the computer to switch it to full speed mode?


IDDQD.
added on the 2004-12-07 23:42:46 by Gargaj Gargaj
Quote:
"...People just don't appreciate the
intelligence of ID's coders; I mean, to be able to cram the entire Quake
code into less than about three lines must not be easy..."


Wow. they are really good dem bwoys at ID.
added on the 2004-12-08 00:00:33 by NoahR NoahR
Quote:
I've also developed a new sound program. It has many features: echo,
reverb, filtering. The filtering can be used for noise reduction and
unlimited bass enhancement.


This guy is really really good. Id swear that if you enchance the bass enough, at some point the speakers is going to say "plopfff" and kick the membrane out. ^__^
added on the 2004-12-08 00:08:26 by NoahR NoahR
Date: Tue, 19 Nov 96 23:07:00 PST
The date may be an excuse.
Gargaj: You were pretty young back than. ;)
IDKFA!
added on the 2004-12-08 02:40:54 by dipswitch dipswitch
Madenmann: I wrote my first programs (C64) when I was 4. What's your excuse? ;)
added on the 2004-12-08 09:06:58 by Gargaj Gargaj
IDCLIP!
added on the 2004-12-08 11:21:38 by kb_ kb_
IDCALIFRALISTICEXPLIDOSIOUS
added on the 2004-12-08 12:10:16 by uns3en_ uns3en_
real men use only IDCHOPPERS
added on the 2004-12-08 12:14:19 by psenough psenough
in nightmare mode ofcourse.
added on the 2004-12-08 12:14:37 by psenough psenough
IDOSENSEALOTOFGAMERSAROUNDHERE
added on the 2004-12-08 12:15:23 by Stelthzje Stelthzje
IDSPISPOPD!

(and we all know that stands for 'Smashing Pumkins In Small Piles Of Putrid Debris')
added on the 2004-12-08 12:45:38 by okkie okkie
pumPkins even
added on the 2004-12-08 12:46:10 by okkie okkie
Indeed! It somehow reminded me of me. Especially with those Vram tests. But I do insist, still that Doom should do stosd =)

Somehow I can feel that guy. During 96, I was sending similar funny letters to a computer magazine (Of course, I never got a reply), being clueless but wishing to learn. I read these letters again and made me laugh hard, but I recognize that spirit in my writtings..

DNKROZ
added on the 2004-12-08 13:56:47 by Optimus Optimus

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