pouët.net

Go to bottom

Hobnobs With Satan [128byte] by Reservoir Gods [web]

 o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
o                                                                              o
o                              HOBNOBS WITH SATAN                              o
o                                                                              o
o                               A 128 Byte Intro                               o
o                               by ReservoirGods                               o
o                                                                              o
o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o


As we all know, the prince  of  darkness  is  rather  partial to the odd oatmeal
based biscuit. He even enslaved son-of-Rudyard Mr. Kipling to inflict Cake based
terror on the masses.

Imagine popping round  to  Lucifer's  humble  abode  for  a  coffee  morning and
stuffing your face with  chocolate  biccies  whilst  staring  into the vortex of
despair. ( It's like Luton but bigger ).

As the crumbs fall into a hiccup  in the space/time continuum they are stretched
into cobwebs spanning infinity. Their mass is  reduced to zero whilst their size
envelops the universe.

"More Tea?" enquires Satan.
"No thanks, I've got plenty" you say nodding towards the bucket of hot liquid on
your armrest.
"Oh go on, go on." insists the bringer of misery.
You think it unwise to argue.
"And another biscuit?"
"Well.." you hesitate, eyeing a pile of biscuits the size of the Alps waiting to
be scoffed.
"You can never have too  many  hob-nobs."  the  toaster  of humanity says with a
wink.
"The packets do seem to run out quickly..." you begin
"Packets! Pah! I get them by  the  factory  load.  I just send down some natural
disaster or plague onto the workers and  whilst  they  are dying in agony I help
myself to a couple of lorry loads of the ginger magic!"
"I suppose that's one way of..."
"Perks of the job." remarks the ambassador of  evil as he takes a large slurp of
tea. "Isn't PG tips great?"
"I don't want to know what you do to the monkeys to get so much!" you protest.
"Oh its nothing really." says  the  harbinger  of  destruction with a dismissive
wave of the hand. "On to more important  matters. What do you think of that Tony
Blairs?"
"Erm..."
"He's a  wonderful  guy.  I  remember  meeting  him  at  a  small  but exclusive
restaurant in Islington - I was  sorting  out  a particularly nasty bout of food
poisoning. He the glint of a megalomaniac in  his eye, even then. I said to him,
Tony young lad all this could be yours.  You give me socialism and I'll give you
great Britain. It was a great deal."
You sigh. "And I thought it was all down to Peter Mandelson."
The devil laughs nervously.  "Oh  no.  Nasty  piece  of  work  he  is, but quite
gormless. I'm not looking forward to him turning up."
"That won't be for ages though will it?"
An impish glint flickers across the  lord  of  darkness's eyes. "Its sooner than
you think. The great millennium  dome  disaster!  I  can't  wait! Now, more hob-
nobs?"


 o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
                               HOBNOBS WITH SATAN
o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o


What you will need:

 o HASBRO "My Little Falcon030"
 o A monitor capable of displaying colour images
 o An FPU ( quite important this! )
 o GEM 98 operating system
 o A little patience

Switch your machine into 320x400 True Colour mode.

For desktop dads that is:
 40 column
 Interlace On (Double Line Off on VGA)
 True colour mode

Run HOBNOBS.PRG

Watch and marvel!

Eat some hobnobs in some vicious recursive parody of life!

 o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
                               HOBNOBS WITH SATAN
o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o


Hobnobs with Satan was coded on a Wednesday afternoon.

MrPink adopted his new  alter  ego  of  FPU-DAD  and  starting  bashing out many
strange instructions that all begin with the letter F.

FPUs are FABS.*


* NB Coders joke. Does not contain traces of humour in any sphere of society.
FABS converts the source operand  to  extended  precision  (  if necessary ) and
stores the absolute value  of  that  number  in  the  destination floating point
register after rounding the result  to  the  precision  selected in the floating
point control register. You can now laugh ( if necessary ).

 o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
                               HOBNOBS WITH SATAN
o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o

Contact:

 mrpink_rg@hotmail.com  [ FPU Jokes ]
       sh3@zetnet.co.uk [ Camping Gear ]
    msg_rg@hotmail.com  [ Windscreen Photos ]
 ripley_rg@hotmail.com  [ Spare Monitors ]

 http://www.acs.bolton.ac.uk/~msg1css/maison.htm
 htpp://www.users.zetnet.co.uk/zmoe3/three.htm

 Leon O'Reilly. Cwm Isaf. Abermule. Welshpool. Powys. Wales. SY15 6JL. UK

 o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
                   HOBNOBS WITH SATAN [C] 1998 RESERVOIR GODS
o . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . o
Go to top